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It's weird to think about, because I don't think I used to think of myself as someone who, you know, used a lot of social media or was really online all that much. But then I, like, go back and think about it and it's — I guess it was a really formative part of my life. Especially, like, my early teenage years.

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I was on a bunch of those, like, chat apps. Like 'LGBT Chat' or whatever they were called. They had a lot of similar names and, um, I was from a fairly small, kind of, rural-ish area. Not a lot of out gay people my age, you know? And not that I thought my hometown was, like, bigoted, or anything, just that it wasn't the kind of place where that kind of thing was just visible. So I didn't really know anybody, and I thought going to an online space would be, like, nice to talk to people without the risk of outing myself or something like that.

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I spent a lot of time on stuff like that. I would talk to a lot of other, like, gay kids. Like, early teens. Low commitment, pretty anonymous. It would be stuff like 'how did you know you were, you know, a lesbian' or whatever. I wasn't, like, looking for a girlfriend or anything, just trying to, I don't know, figure things out. Like know that I wasn't misinterpreting things or feel sure that I was actually, you know, pretty gay before saying anything to anyone in-person.

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When I got older, like 16, 17, I started using stuff like Tinder and Her and all of those things. I didn't think about too much, like, in the way of me being a minor or anything. But I was, I guess. And I think that was just what people were doing. Like there weren't that many people in, like, the area anyways, so it was just me and there were other teens I saw, definitely, who would list themselves as, you know, '18 years old' but their bio would say like 'just so you know I'm actually 16' or whatever.

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You couldn't really have – this sounds mean to say, I'm not trying to be, like, ageist – but, like, you couldn't get too specific with, like, ages. I remember this one woman I was talking to was, like, 37. And it seems kinda creepy, I guess, in retrospect. Because she, you know, knew I was underage. And she still talked to me and even, like, invited me over.

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I did almost go there, yeah. I really considered it. I had her, uh, you know – like I got in the car and just decided not to. She had a kid, like a daughter. And I think that was the deciding thing. Because her daughter, like, she showed me pictures, and she wasn't – like she wasn't that much younger than me. And that's when I started to get, like, that's when I got kind of weirded out. But I don't know. I felt bad about it, too. Like, I was lying or leading her on or you know. 

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I'm sorry, that's, like, so weird to say to someone. That probably was not at all what you were looking for.

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Yeah, um, I feel weird about it, I guess, but it's also not, like, that bad. Like I got myself into it, you know. And nothing happened.

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I don't use those anymore. I think, like, I think some people probably get a lot from dating apps and stuff, but it's just not really for me.